Monday, April 29, 2013

Because I tend to get lost, NOT because I'm a prepper!

I'm not a doomsday prepper.  I promise.  I just like to know how to do cool stuff, like build a shelter (fort) and start a fire (pyro).  I'm not at the food hunter/gatherer level yet... I did buy the 'edible plants book' though, and I may read it one day... All I know so far is I can boil up the leaves from a stinging nettle and eat a dandelion.  hm, I think I'll start a new diet program.  If I could only eat those two things, I bet I could whither away to about nothing in a matter of days!

So when you are lost in the woods, make sure you have some olive oil handy and a wok.  Pick some wild onions, then take your pants off.  Proceed to walk through tall weeds until you feel a vary unpleasant stinging on your nethers.  Then pick the offenders and fry them up!

I'm actually a bit intrigued by the idea now... I've never eaten those horrible stinging nettles, but  it seems a proper end to a weed that put my legs through hell.

Or you can do what this fancy pants did with the dandelion.  And don't forget the pretty bowl to serve it in.  After all, when lost in the woods , it is most important to bring the essentials.  Oh, and bring some bacon along to sprinkle on the dandelions.  Really, it's not much fun to be lost, but if you add bacon, it will be alright.  ...I found the fancy pics here and here.

I was looking up, on the wonderful webosphere, survival skills.  Most posts I found were directed toward men learning how to be manly men.  Hence this post.  It made me a teesny bit grumpy seeing everything directed toward men, because women can be very awesome womenly women too, and I bet we could make a nicer fort.  And we would bring the pretty dishes.

So I'm going to do a series of very cool things that we (Women AND Men) can learn in order to make conversations more fun.  Seriously, everyone gets tired of hearing about how your kid avoided lice by bathing once a month, but everyone will listen when you tell them how you dug a root cellar with dehydrated corn husks.

So come back soon and I'll make the world your oyster.

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