Friday, April 26, 2013

What IS That?!

Every once in a while I remember that I have a blog, and that about 6 people actually read it, so I should think of something to say.  Many times something just happens and poof, blog post.  Unfortunately, nothing has happened that I felt was blog worthy.

Until now.

Or a few days ago really... I've been busy getting injured then miraculously getting better just in time for the doctor appointment that I made when I was in pain.  Because I'm stubborn and a bit paranoid, I'm going to go to the appointment anyway.  I don't think I'll fake it, but I could... I could just do the proper wincing at the proper poking, and maybe come away with some good drugs.  That's a lie though... I still have a dozen oxycodone left over from when I had a wicked bad ear infection.  See, even when I have party drugs I don't take them...  I really did hurt my shoulder though.  I thought I tore my rotator cuff, but maybe I just dreamed it.  I guess the doc I see today will have the 'a crazy hypochondriac lady came into the office today..' story to tell his wife.  Of all the reasons to go to see this doc, being the star of his story after his day at the office isn't the worst reason in the world.  More of a purpose.  I aim to give someone a good story, even if it is at my own expense.  Kind of makes me a saint, no?  I should write the Pope.  I like this Pope.  Wasn't to fond of ExBenedict, we never really connected.  But this guy seems like he would smell just as bad after a long hike, so we can be buds.

And the shoulder isn't even my story.  (It's the doc's, duh)

The other day, I was walking out of my daughters school when my foot began to hurt.  I figured there was a tiny thorn or something stuck in my sock, so when I got to the car, I sat on the edge of my seat and stripped my foot naked.  There was a tiny thorn, or more like a fiber from a cactus that found its way into the ball of my foot. It was maybe three millimeters long.  No biggie, right.  I just took hold of the end and gently pulled.  and pulled , and pulled.  The fiber kept coming out.

Y'all, it was more than an inch long.  And it was a hair.  And it wasn't ATTACHED.

It was like finding a strand of hair in jello and pulling it out.  There was no pop at the end as you would feel pulling a hair from your scalp.  It just slid right out.  Holy crap, I had a HAIR embedded in my FOOT.

How the heck does a hair end up inside of a foot?!

I remember seeing a story on the interwebs a while back of a toddler that had a feather embedded in his neck.  There were pictures, so I know it was real... can't fake that stuff.
I feel an odd connection with feather neck now.  Two freaks with weird stuff in their bodies.

I might join the circus.

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